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How to recognise suicide warning signs
What you can do to help
If you’re worried that a friend or loved one is thinking of suicide – here are some of the key warning signs to watch out for:
What to listen for:
Talking or writing about hurting themselves, dying or saying that they want to die
Talking about ways to die or having a suicide plan
Saying that ‘nothing is going to change’ or they feel like a ‘burden’
Saying they have no purpose in their lives, that they feel hopeless
What to look for:
Engaging in self-harm or risk taking behaviour
Giving items away or saying goodbye to people
Becoming more inward looking and withdrawing from family and friends
Changes in their sleep patterns – too much or too little sleep
Extreme emotions or dramatic changes in mood
Increasing their use of drugs or alcohol
If you recognise one or more of these warning signs in a loved one’s behaviour, don’t wait for someone else to do something.
Contact Pieta
Pieta is Ireland’s suicide prevention charity. Our qualified counsellors specialise in suicide prevention and self-harm.
Whether you’re in crisis yourself, or whether you know someone who is, we’re here to offer FREE expert, practical help. We have centres all over Ireland and Pieta’s suicide, self-harm & suicide bereavement crisis helpline is open 24/7.
If you believe someone is considering suicide, the APR approach may help. APR stands for:
ASK. PERSUADE. REFER.
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ASK
If the person is opening up to you, engage them in a nonjudgemental manner with empathy and don’t be afraid to ask them directly if they are struggling with thoughts of suicide or self-harming behaviour. Ask them directly “Are you thinking about suicide or wanting to kill yourself?” Don’t say “Do you want to hurt yourself?”. Self-harming is not the same as suicide.
Don’t be afraid. It’s understandable that you might be worried that mentioning suicide to someone you love who is in distress could encourage the idea. But that is a myth. The reality is that talking to them openly and honestly is one of the best things you can do. Just listening is one of the most powerful tools we have.
PERSUADE
Calmly and gently try to persuade the person to seek help or to allow you to assist them in getting help. Say “Will you go with me to get help?” or “Will you let me assist you to get help?”
Or ask them to agree not to act on their suicidal thoughts until you’ve arranged help for them. If you can’t persuade them to seek help in person straight away remember that Pieta’s Crisis Helpline is open 24 hours day.
REFER
As quickly as you can, refer or guide the person you are concerned about to Pieta (or your doctor or local mental health service). If you can, make the call with them or travel with them to the appointment.
Remember, most people who talk about suicide do not want to die. They simply want to stop the pain they feel.